Aztez – A Game of Conquest and Brutality
8Feb/1221

Combat Analysis: Bayonetta

You knew it was coming! The game I regularly rave about as containing the finest combat engine ever devised is going to get its own analysis. It simply doesn't make sense not to. Heads up! This one's going to be a doozy. *cracks knuckles*

BUT WAIT.

Since most of you are already rolling your eyes at me because you HATE/HATED/REFUSED TO PLAY Bayonetta, I'm going to do you a favor and get a couple of the obvious "meta" cons out of the way now so that you understand that I'm not just an irrational fanboy and that I understand the concerns you had the first time you saw this game and/or played it. Seriously, I get it. Once those are out of the way, I will resume the standard analysis format of Pros, followed by Cons, followed by an articulate and straightforward summation of both. And for those of you that have a problem with the game but you didn't actually play it any point, then get out of my site because you are a child and children shouldn't be playing or reading about beat 'em ups.

Meta Cons:

  • This is easily one of the most Japanese games ever. Not in the "it takes place in Japan and looks and sounds like Japan" sense, but in the "those extraterrestrial buffoons across the ocean made another game that doesn't properly register with my occidental sensibilities" sense. The vanguard of the gamer elite can handle this, but for everyone else it's too much and that's fair.
  • The game's titular character is one of the most polarizing character concepts of all time. You either love her or hate her; there appears to be no middle ground. Unfortunately, the overwhelming response to the character is one of hate, and by extension, resentment. Anyone with a feminist bone in their body found the character hypersexualized and objectifying, and anyone trying too hard to distinguish themselves from children and teenagers found the character hypersexualized and juvenile. While I do believe these are snap judgments*, I fully understand why they happen.
  • The game itself (outside of the combat, I mean) is not an enjoyable or interesting experience. The game structure is just about as straightforward as it can possibly be, the characters are all entirely absurd, the plot is inane, the cutscenes are utter nonsense, and the music is unflinchingly Japanese. Please note that I am straight DYING here trying not to raise the point that all of these things (outside of the combat) are trivial and shouldn't carry any weight in your enjoyment of the game's crux, but I'm trying to squarely meet you in the middle before jumping down your throat with the Pros. ;)

Pros:

  • Every basic movement mechanic is flawless; she runs, jumps, and dodges beautifully yet functionally, and everything feels perfect. And since we're here, I dare you to run as a panther for any real distance and NOT cream your brain with joy-semen. Hideki Kamiya (the director of both Bayonetta and Okami, among other things) already did this very well in Okami, and then went and perfected it in Bayonetta.
  • Every single attack across very single weapon looks and feels fantastic. Animations are fast and brutal and have perfect acceleration/deceleration curves.
  • The sheer variety of attacks across the different main weapon types is staggering. If that wasn't enough, they can be mixed and matched in pairs (the character equips a weapon in her hands and also on her feet)  in what is easily one of the most versatile and expressive beat 'em ups ever.
  • While the sensation of striking enemies is good enough, the sensation of killing them is fantastic. The attention to detail paid everywhere else is just as present in this department as the (very monstrous) enemies are repeatedly disassembled, torn, burned, splattered, lacerated, and crushed. All the while unleashing horrific screams of pain and agony.
  • There is a substantial variety of temporary weapons (dropped by enemies that "burnout" very quickly) that are also beautiful, distinct, and effective. Furthermore, they become CRUCIAL when trying to play for score.
  • The attack effects are succinct yet impactful, and are nuanced beyond reason. There is a startling array of different particle and screen effects occurring simultaneously and they are all somehow in harmony with each other. And this is across every weapon. Some of the more advanced (secret) weapons have effects I've never seen in any game before in my life. Seriously, these are effects you can eat for dinner over candlelight with brie.
  • There is a handful of accessories that you can find and equip that grant you access to unique mechanics and character features. Some of them are sillier and less useful than others but it's still ultimately another layer of expression which is always awesome.
  • The defense mechanic is as perfect as a defense mechanic can be; easy to use and surprisingly deep in its utility. See the Meaningful And Elegant Defense Mechanics post for elaboration/further raving on its perfection and elegance. To summarize, the mechanic uses only button, is simply a matter of timing, and when done correctly rewards you greatly. And big surprise; it looks and feels great.
  • Speaking of defense, there is a mechanic you can unlock later in the game that functions almost identically to the parry mechanic in Street Fighter 3: Third Strike. It's fascinating for a couple different reasons. Firstly, it's oddly compelling to do in 3d. It seems like it shouldn't be but is is. While it requires deft timing, it is hugely rewarding and very powerful. The most interesting thing about it is that using the default defense mechanic trains you for its use, which becomes critical at the highest difficulty level where the default defense mechanic is inhibited.
  • Any mechanic in the game can be cancelled by the dodge or with a jump, with the exception of the dodge itself. It makes the game feel incredibly responsive and controlled.
  • While there is a lock-on mechanic, it is not necessary! This is one of the most refreshing and delightful miracles Bayonetta brings to the table. The game lets you direct your attacks in much the same way God Of War does; by using the movement analog stick to orient yourself. But it's so subtle and well implemented (and without God of War's non-interactive camera) that you simply don't even think about it when playing.
  • There is a ridiculous mechanic that lets you fire your hand and feet weapons (if they are guns, which most of the game's weapons are) WHILE YOU DYNAMICALLY PUNCH AND KICK WITH THEM. What's staggering is how unnecessary it is. You can do it and be spectacular, or you can forget it and just continue to play at any level.
  • On the surface, the game has a flexible mash flow. At the higher levels, you realize it actually has a circuit jumping mash flow. Interestingly enough, you can play the game in either way and still be entirely successful.
  • At first glance, the air game is not remarkable. It's done well in the sense that it feels just as good as the ground game, but it isn't until you realize how to exploit a specific movement mechanic to stay in the air as long as you'd like that you fully understand how remarkable it is. It's almost just as much its own game as the ground game, which hasn't happened since Otogi.
  • There is a huge variety of enemies all with their very own mechanical identity. There is no cloning or palette swapping in the entire cast of adversaries.
  • The sounds play a significant part in Bayonetta's moment-to-moment. Not only is a huge part of the enemy tell a distinct sound, but the audio stack in general (both in and out of fights) is always very unusual but functional.
  • There is an INCREDIBLE feature in this game that allows you to turn any loading screen into an empty room where you can indefinitely swing the character's equipped weapons around. This is great for studying the vast array of combos that the game has provided you with.
  • The combo scoring system is super complex but super interesting, and when understood, turns on a light so bright and fun that you will have a hard time soullessly button mashing ever again.
  • There is a solid item construction system that goes hand in hand with the bit-collecting you do as you play. Unfortunately, items are rendered completely obsolete by entering the higher levels of play.

Cons:

  • In the grand and patronizing tradition, you must not only unlock a bunch of mechanics, but you must unlock a bunch of weapons as well. Some of the weapons you essentially get just by progressing and some of them you get by exploring, but some you only get after fulfilling UNBELIEVABLE requirements meant only for people with a ton of time on their hands and this is fucking maddening. The only reason I have access to most of the weapons is because I spent a tedious evening exploiting the game in a very unintended way in order to aquire them. There is a weapon I'm still missing and I won't get it until I've met an asinine commitment requirement, so I might never see it and that makes me super resentful.
  • YOU ARE MAKING ME MASH BUTTONS TO PERFORM SENSATIONAL FATALITIES I DON'T CARE ABOUT GOD DAMNIT I'M NOT 17 ANYMORE QUIT DOING THIS TO ME FUCK.
  • There is no substantial variation on the combat encounter apart from the standard mixing up of enemy types. There are a couple instances in which you must protect an entity in the play space, but this was clearly an afterthought and is not at all compelling.
  • Visually, enemies are a gigantic golden mess. Fortunately, enemy silhouettes are BARELY distinguishable across the other enemies in their tier. Barely. But the rest of their general look is a contrived swirl and I couldn't redraw any of the game's enemies on a piece of paper from memory, even if you had a gun to my head.
  • There is no formal practice mode with enemy dummies. The empty-room feature is great, but there are some things you simply can't practice in an empty room and it's too cumbersome practicing in the game's preplanned encounters.
  • Even on the default difficulty setting, the game is fairly difficult. This in itself isn't any kind of a problem, but the real issue here is the secret game buried inside of Bayonetta; that game is "playing Bayonetta for a respectable rank". Shit gets real when you attempt this, and there is no valid introduction to this inner-game and all of its complexity which makes it that much more incredibly difficult than it already is.
  • In order to understand the guts of this game, I had to buy a special hardcover strategy guide made by two batshit crazy English guys that collaborated with Platinum Games (Bayonetta's developer) to bring all of the technical information to the surface. This information should be within the game, or within the manual, or formally published on a free website. Not in an obscure collector's item I had to hunt down and pay too-much-money for. There is a Bradygames guide, but it not nearly as comprehensive.

In summation; Bayonetta as a combat experience is utterly magnificent,  and it's not at all surprising considering the game is another brain child of the man that brought us Devil May Cry 1, Viewtiful Joe, and Okami. Love or hate his work, he (and the people he works with) possess a legendary amount of experience with combat and it it all shines through in Bayonetta. There are few things more exciting and fulfilling than skating (which you can literally do if you have unlocked the ice skates leg weapon) from encounter to encounter and mutilating your way into a platinum (or being a warrior of great caliber, a PURE platinum) rank. But unfortunately (fascinatingly), the game is the biggest barrier to itself. In addition to the many conservative and traditional decisions that prevented Bayonetta from pushing the genre forward, it's penetrating wackiness and rampant irreverent sexuality really alienates people and prevents them from opening up to it. I will NOW officially raise the point that that these things (outside of the combat) are ultimately trivial and shouldn't carry any weight in your enjoyment of the game's crux; the finest combat engine ever devised.

*In all fairness, I don't really subscribe to the idea of "hypersexualization is a problem" because I'm a hedonistic human male and I welcome hypersexualization in any form. HOWEVER, I don't actually believe the character is objectifying or juvenile. Luckily for me, this guy said everything that I could possibly say already.

  • ALRIGHT ALRIGHT I’ll get it, jeez :( I live in a house with five women though. They saw the joke with spanking in God Hand but this is going to be harder to get into the habit of.

    • Whoah whoah hold up.
      1. Don’t JEEZ me! With a follow up :( !
      2. Why in the fuck do you live in a house with 5 women? I mean, nothing against women, that’s just a lot of humans to share a living space with.
      3. Are they really going to have something to do with your playing of Bayonetta outside of the comments they’ll make while you try to play it?

      Besides, if they’re women of letters, they’ll see Bayonetta for what she is; the woman to end all women.

  • Don’t worry, I’m being sarcy, they’ll laugh. I’ll leave the reasons for my living arrangement to your imagination :P

    • Well then I’m just going to assume you’ve built a dedicated and decadent sex cult around yourself because that’s exactly what I’d do if I had any tolerance for other humans in my living space.

      I expect your brain thoughts on Bayonetta at hours 1, 3, and 10. If you get to hour 20+ I’ll know what your thoughts are so it’s all good.

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  • John Polson

    Bayonetta is the woman to end all women, aside from Morrigan. Amazingly stylish game with fun fighting mechanics. I appreciate ur deep look into this, which makes me raise the bar for Aztez even higher.

  • peter

    excelente text brah,

    bayonetta gave me an experience that no game gave to me: i fell in love with it on the loading screens.
    it was in those loading screeens that i realised that even the simplier button combinations in bayonetta reveal how rich and complex and articulate the fighting system really is and how most fighting games are just lazy or limited.

    what i never understood is why people love to tell women what to do, from feminist to misogynist they all see to have a plan on how women should behave…poor bayonetta can’t express her self trough her sexuality, it’s like calling madonna a sexist XD

  • Tom

    No amount of “No trust me, the combat is really good” had sold me on Bayonetta UNTIL READING THIS.

  • Eric Drury

    I purchased the game after reading this, and I’m glad I did.

  • The Fool Who Bears The Name Freedom

    I also bought this game, having read this. Bleeding pants, this game is the titleholder for the word “whipsaw.” Have some amazing combat! It’s ridiculously difficult to do some pretty basic things! Now that you’ve had a chance to figure out two or three combos you can rely on for general purpose, and practiced Just Dodging, have a boss fight where the Just Dodge mechanic doesn’t work for no apparent reason, but only sometimes! Now there are enemies on fire, which means you can’t melee them, so please refrain from doing anything interesting for the duration of the chapter! By the way we have quick time events that don’t make any sense and carry the consequence of death for a mistake!

    I really, really want to like this game. Like, REALLY. The combat is great when they let it! Why won’t they let the game be great?!

    • Perico Palotes

      Witch time doesn’t work with gracious and glorious, but it works with grace and glory, they look similar but the first ones have a human face instead.

  • Azeke

    I can’t wait to read what you have to say about Wonderful 101. I truly believe it’s a new landmark title from Kamiya.

    • Can’t wait to get a WiiU and play it!

  • dan

    What air mechanic are you talking about? Kulshedra’s pull? Jumping on enemies?

    • There’s a mechanic that allows you to jump off enemy’s heads, which is all fine and good, but the thing I didn’t know was an obscure way to cancel an attack in the air and initiate the jump-off-the-head mechanic. It’s a way to stay in the air forever once you’ve nailed the execution.

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  • Perico Palotes

    “The game itself (outside of the combat, I
    mean) is not an enjoyable or interesting experience. The game structure
    is just about as straightforward as it can possibly be, the characters
    are all entirely absurd, the plot is inane, the cutscenes are utter
    nonsense, and the music is unflinchingly Japanese. Please note that I am
    straight DYING here trying not to raise the point that all of these
    things (outside of the combat) are trivial and shouldn’t carry any
    weight in your enjoyment of the game’s crux, but I’m trying to squarely
    meet you in the middle before jumping down your throat with the Pros. ;)”

    Alright fella, lets go point by point and excuse my bad english.
    ” is not an enjoyable or interesting experience”
    So.
    We got platinum games, animating everything, from top models to building sized monsters, all of them moving so….”naturally”, with every animation worked frame by frame no matter how pointless (something i miss in almost all western blockbuster titles), the attention to detail from the characters, weapons and little trivia you can find through the levels (from the name of bayonetta’s mother written in the lipstic to the daemonic and angelic writings meaning something, not counting all the symbolism, folklore and mitholgy present in the names and shapes of the angels and demons and the objects she use) to the magnificient scenarios based upon modernism (vigrid, angels and paradiso are modernism at it’s finest, to the point of a section of the second level being a portion of the park guell, in barcelona, made by antonio Gaudi) and art deco style of the latest levels that we can see in the buildings, vehicles and even the fucking aeroplane. The motherfucking references to classic arcade games and the wonderfully matching voice acting (i cannot imagine the voice of bayonetta not being the one of helena taylor or enzo with a completely different voice, despite how cheesy they are), the wonderful backgrounds in levels like the paradiso vigrid with the angels and floating buildings or the galaxies and stars or the city in the lumen tower that you can see while you walk outside the building. The long process of designing bayonetta with all those hundreds of different beautiful sketches based upon french fashion mannequins, the stylization of the characters in a time in which “stylization” means small bodies with huge boobs and huge heads for women and walking refrigerators as men, the cheesiness and crazyness in a time of gritty tryhard teenager war and survival fantasies designed only to stroke the “gamers” ego by telling them how “mature” and “smart” they are, the mafnificient sound effects, the fluidity, the amount of content put on it, the wonderful choral epic music from the battles and the action choreography during the boss fights…and at the end, for what?
    So people can say “the combat is great but everything else is shit”……………

    Holy crap, no wonder the western videogame industry has become so pandering and empty, why bothering with quality and effort when you are going to get completely ignored? why spending time and money in talented people and polished work when an indie plataformer 40 minutes long or a cinematic saturday night mediocre movie is going to be praised as the second coming of jesus christ porn star? Of course enjoying something is completely subjective but bayonetta is
    far from being a half assed work only enjoyable by “it’s combat”. That someone like you can say something like that with a straight face makes me fear for the quality of your product beyond the combat (not like that would be a bad thing, but don’t we have enough souless and half assed games already in this industry?)

    ” the characters
    are all entirely absurd”

    Yes, and no, two sexy and stylized modern witches who happen to be the main characters breaking the typical cliches of western game females (yes, i know the game is japanese) and making fun of classical ones, which we can see in their flamboyant and overconfident nature, the dialogues and gestures, even their fucking clothes for gods sake (oh look, she is sucking a lollypop like it was my di…ouch, that’s a small dick, oh look she is doing some pole dancing….while cutting that elephant sized guy in half, oh look she is getting nude ha ha………oh wait a moment is that a gigant demon centipede coming from her crotch and devouring that huge thing?, oh look she is gonna do something sexy while that building has been threw to her……oh, it was a headbutt, she headbutted a skyscraper into the sky).
    The rest of the characters are as absurd as a bowl of cornflakes in a breakfast club, the tough black guy who happens to be a fallen angel, the Danny de Vito and Joe Pescy wannabe (who is related with the devil may cry series) and the young man journalist who investigate weird shit and the supervillain flamboyant guy. They are absurd to a certain degree, but not out of place or disturbing and i don’t see how that can be a problem unless you are into grizzly middle aged men or generic female characters with a pony tail and nothing more

    “the plot is inane, the cutscenes are utter
    nonsense” the plot is quite interesting and not common at all, the characters, places, background, objects, everything is related to that plot, lets please stop confusing “STORY” with “NARRATIVE”. The narrative was atrocious and confusing, the story wasn’t in any way or manner, just like how uncharted and the last of us have incredible empty and generic stories but wonderful narrative.
    A clan of witches and a clan of pseudo wizard monks who keep the quilibrium in the world between the forces of hell and heaven, suddenly two of them fall in love and have a forbidden baby that will cause the destruction of both and finally save the fucking world from her own father, you don’t get to play as the goody monks (who weren’t good in any way or manner) but as the evil witches, the outcast to be more precise and you have to fight angels using demons (this last part less original than some may like to think but lets simply say that is not as overused as other plots), and then there is the secondary characters and their plot, the old brainwashed friend, the journalist with a personal grudge against the main character for something she didn’t do, the black market tough guys doing shady shit and helping bayonetta and the james bond over complex time travel plot from the main bad guy. It’s definitely not something new but definitely not “pointless” or “inane”.

    And for god’s sake, this, this little gem right here:
    “and the music is unflinchingly Japanese”
    What? what is japanese exactly? the latin choirs with instrumental music? the jazz fussion instrumental songs? the cover of an english song sung by a swedish singer (Helena Noguerra) in english that also happens to be jazz fussion? Dude, this game has plenty of japanese shit, but the music ain’t one of them, AT ALL.

    And last i don’t see how a character like this is sexist unless you fall into the fake internet feminism mentality from the last……..5 years. She has boobs, so she is sexist? So do I have to think that ku kux klan militants are racist because the dress in white and not because they hang blacks from trees? Or that nazis are antisemitic because they wear swasticas in their arms and not because, well, you know, they killed millions of jews?
    She does sexy poses in a completely unserious way to the point of obvious “in your face” parody, when she gets “nude”( you still can see how her tits and ass still perfectly covered with a one piece suit) she summons giant bloody monsters that end in explicit carnage, she even mocks tipical cliches like pole dancing (hell, tell me about a single game in which a female character didn’t know how to do gymnastics in a bar like it was the most normal shit in the world, hell, look at WET, is there something more ridiculous than this cliche?), lollypop sucking, holy shit she even poses to the camera, YOU CAN EVEN HEAR AND SEE THE CAMERA FLASH! even the sexy taunts are designed to make the enemies angry to the point they call her “harlot” in their angelic language (yes, there is a perfectly translated demonic and angelic language in game and those floating symbols and weird speech mean stuff, shocking somebody would take so much effort into something and being completely ignored, RIGHT?).
    And beyond all this silly and parodic shit you still have a female character that doesn’t fall a single instant into a situation of needing help, with one exception, in which she get saved by ,gasp, ANOTHER WOMAN, she is strong, secure, overconfident, flamboyant and cocky to the point of even making fun of Luka when he tries to rescue her (when he tries to grab her in the airport and she simply pass by with a smile and he smash into a wall), her snarky remarks, she being in complete control of the situation and not giving a shit attitude ala uncle Dante from Devil may cry 4, her continuous remarks to her dominant sexuality and her complete awareness about it for the only purpose of satisfying herself whatever the passive spectator likes it or not (sexual liberation, do internet feminists know what means?). Her fighting movements do look like the ones of a strong warrior as so do her sounds when she figths or her animations when she runs (she walks like a top model but then rush like an atlethe, does someone here remembers WET? the main character walked like a street thug, which was great but run like a MOTHERFUCKING CHEERLEADER, JESUS CHRIST), holy shit even her screams sound like real screams instead of fake girly shit or even the atrociuos moanings from the new and “mature non sexist at all because her boobs are smaller, duh” tomb rayder remake, she shoots like a monster and drives a harley (two typical symbols of masculinity) like a motherfucking boss, she even impersonates motherfucking Bruce Lee being the only female version of him in videogames (well, there is also one of the Ryn sisters in anarchy reigns, made by platinum games too, bayonetta also wears the famous Bruce Lee outfit from the game of death movie in that game, the kill bill suit).
    And then we have the freudian shit, she kills her own father for betraying her mother (the scene in which she shoots the lipstic? That lipstic has the name of Balder and bayonetta’s mother, Rosa, written on their demon/angel language, who died because of what Balder did), driving a harley on top of a missile pointing up to jubileus legs that opens up to reveal a hundred men bodies , or more obvious, the tiny lollypop thingy like game overthinker said, or her own physical proportions, for the long legs and small head make her look bigger and intimidating, something that big headed characters can’t reflect so easily (game overthinker uses DOA characters as an example, i would like to put instead the new trend of young female sideckikcs from western gaming we are seing lately, and that of course nobody calls sexist despite being designed to cause a protective reaction in the player, who happens to be a big and strong fatherly figure).
    And finally we have all the over the top shit, from playing hot potato with a intercontinental missile to grab a fucking castle sized monster and hurling it into the air or weightlift a train wagon like it was made of plastic.

    I mean come on man, come on, i’m sorry for taking this shit more serious than i should………but come fucking on, you are not an internet bloger playing to be a journalist, you are part of the fucking industry and you say those little “marvels” about bayonetta?
    Dude, buy this book, seriously
    http://www.amazon.com/The-Eyes-Bayonetta-Art-Book/dp/1926778421/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1403371688&sr=8-1&keywords=the+eyes+of+bayonetta

    it is full of insight on the process of designing everything, from the main character to weapons, with dozens of bayonetta sketches and their explanations, funny enough they focus to much in the art deco part , not pointing out the modernist elements, but anyway ,hardly the “they only took care of the combat everything else is pointless” shit you have said

    • Maximillian Atissimo

      Surprisingly the ‘feminists’ that mysteriously came out of the “gaming closet” during 2009 all complained about something that has to do with the art style of the game. They somehow have this idea embedded into their line of thought that sexuality =/= sexualization/objectification which is completely wrong. Bayonetta is one of the most lovable game protagonists in recent history up there with all the platinum game characters yet they try to find fault in her and judge her based on her appearance and they can never see the hypocrisy in doing so.
      Even more surprising is that most don’t even like video games or beat em’ ups/hack n slash but still choose to nitpick games based on the ‘oppressive’ sexual content so they’re just trying to get their opinion out about something they don’t care about in the first place but just want to whine endlessly and pointlessly about a video game.
      That really hurt Platinum games and gave it a bad image among the ‘sexually oppressed’ and held back the sales.

    • Slow down, bud. This was a combat analysis. It was written as an intellectual and creative exercise and to provide a mechanical view of the product to A. other action game developers and B. players and fans of action games. I prefaced it with those meta cons (unlike any other of the combat analyses I’ve done) because I was met with absurd and almost zealous resistance from friends and colleagues when I recommended the game, and I felt the need to communicate that I understand the issues people had with it so they wouldn’t assume tremendous bias on my part and actually consider the analysis for what it was.

      I never said “the combat is great but everything else is shit”. I never even came close to saying that. I kind of feel like you didn’t read past the meta-cons, frankly. But I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt and address some of your concerns.

      I fully understand the unbelievable amount of time and work that went into the product, and I fully recognize the insane attention to detail. But these things simply don’t have any place in an article of this nature; a mechanical deconstruction of combat mechanics and systems. However, that doesn’t mean I don’t love Platinum Games, absolutely revere Hideki Kamiya/Team Little Angels, and think Bayonetta (as a package and idea) is brilliant. I love the character, I love the world, and I even paid stupid amounts of money for The Eyes Of Bayonetta and the Futurepress guide a long time ago. It’s why I never made any assertions about Bayonetta being “half-assed”.

      And as a personal request, don’t project your frustrations with the western game industry on me. I am one developer on a two-man team. So ease up on that.

      The point is, despite deeply appreciating the product for what it is, I don’t find any of the gameplay outside of the combat enjoyable. I just don’t care for it, and find it very tedious. I am an arcade gamer first and foremost, and I simply wish for pure experiences. But this isn’t a condemnation of Bayonetta in particular; I don’t like it in God Of War, or Lords Of Shadow, or Ninja Gaiden, or Devil May Cry, or anywhere. It’s just not my thing.

      Who said I had a problem with the absurd characters? I fucking love absurd characters. Asserting that the cast is absurd was also not a condemnation. For some people it is! In particular, some of the people I was recommending the game to. I made a point to say “I get that you think they’re absurd” for my previously stated reasons. While I don’t particularly care a lot for the cast on the personal level, I love everything about Bayonetta herself.

      I’m not going to engage you on the plot/story/narrative because those are things I just don’t care about ever. Sorry. I’m a “watching porn for the sex” kind of guy, and I don’t care about the contextual vehicle caring it. In fact, I’d prefer it not be there and obviously we will never see eye to eye here because you do, and that’s fine.

      And yes, the music Japanese musicians create is distinctly different from the music Americans create. Also not a condemnation. At the end of the day, Bayonetta is an incredibly Japanese product and no one can fucking argue with that. AND THIS ISN’T A PROBLEM. Not for me, anyway.

      As I stated at the end of the article, I don’t have think the character is sexist. I wasn’t asserting this in the meta cons, I was addressing the assertions of others.

      From one sincere and intense fan of Bayonetta to the other, just ignore that ugly meta cons section. It wasn’t directed at you. It was directed at my fucking ridiculous high-brow associates who consider themselves too good for certain things. Go put this shit in front of them!

      Anyway, I still appreciate you speaking your mind and I’m sorry you’re concerned about the quality of my game.

      • Perico Palotes

        Your game remembers me the dishwasher, and taking into account i love that game i will buy it , yours looks more complex and i have nothing against it.

        It’s just that hearing shit about bayonetta makes my blood boil, especially when that same people doesn’t stop saying marvels about games that aren’t even the shadow of bayonetta.

        Sorry i vented my shit on you.

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  • lazytigre

    “There is a ridiculous mechanic that lets you fire your hand and feet weapons […] WHILE YOU DYNAMICALLY PUNCH AND KICK WITH THEM. What’s staggering is how unnecessary it is.”

    I am sorry but dodge offset is such a crucial mechanic, and it’s obligatory when playing the game for better ranks, other than that, nice review